I'm only human.
I am beyond overwhelmed.
More than I could ever begin to describe.
And I'm not even overwhelmed with anything in particular, just life.
Recent passing of my grandma this week has just taken its toll on me. She was my mom's mom. And I love my mom more than words can describe. She may drive me crazy once in awhile, but I love her. There's nothing worse than your mother crying and feeling helpless. I'm trying to be strong. My grandma and I weren't very close. I loved her, but I'd be lying if I didn't say I wasn't the best granddaughter. I feel I let my mom down in that sense. I'm on the verge of a breakdown preparing myself for the funeral. I don't know how I'm going to handle seeing my mother so torn apart. I just have to keep reminding my self to be strong.
Changes at work are also slowly starting to weigh on me. Nothing too serious, but definitely up there adding to my stress. As carefree as I try to be, I still tend to over think and worry a lot.
In addition to family and work stress, I've never been so over the people in my life that take my friendship for granted. It's not that easy. I'm a very independent person and I choose my friends carefully based on this fact. I need people that can give me space, but can count on when I need them most. I really don't ask for much. My best friends are the ones I don't have to see and talk to everyday, but connect with them like we never skipped a beat. With that being said, I find it easy to eliminate people from my life without hesitation. I have just a handful of people I call my friends. And I'm blessed with them. But my friend count just keeps dwindling. I've used the block button on my phone more these last few weeks than since I've updated my phone. No regrets. I don't do part time friendships.
And then there's tea...
I find solitude with each cup of tea.
While I am still drinking my Fit Tea (which I love and look forward to reviewing after the 14 days), I have several teas I turn to to keep me sane throughout the day. I have a routine, if you will.
My mornings generally start out with a cup of green tea. Since I am drinking the Fit Tea, this has replaced my normal green tea which is Yogi Blueberry Slim Life Green Tea. By the way, this tea has saved me from gaining 13262541634 pounds this winter. You can get a lifetime supply here. It's not really a lifetime supply, but you can subscribe and save. Trust me, worth it.
By lunchtime/ early afternoon/ gym time I usually need another pick me up so I go for another green tea. This time I opt for Yogi Green Tea Kombucha. Don't be fooled by the name. Although it does "contain" Kombucha, Kombucha is a live bacteria and heat kills its "benefits." However, the flavor is still superb. Keep in mind green tea boosts metabolism and is a healthier source of caffeine for energizing.
As 5 o'clock approaches I am generally about to rip my hair out or go in a corner and cry or have a migraine that will bring me to tears. This is me exaggerating, by the way. This only happens once in awhile. This week is one of those "once in awhiles." It's not every week you have the passing of a family member, major changes at work, and lose another friend. Anyway, for these types of weeks (days) I have Yogi Kava Stress Relief Tea. Kava is known for a few different things. I read somewhere it can even numb the mouth. I'll tell you one thing though, it relaxes the shit out of you. It didn't make me sleepy, but it made my headache (more than likely induced by stress) go away and force me to take a step back and take everything in calmly. Mind you, this could very well be psychological, but hey, if it works, it works.
That's it for my work day tea regimen (at the office). I have more teas I'd love to share, but I'll start with just the basics. Aka the guaranteed 5 day a week teas. Honestly, just talking about my tea has calmed me down from the start of this blog. But there it is.
And I definitely....
Believe in the tea.